I have two great concepts for short conceptual films/gallery shows that would be fabulous but I am way too busy (and/or mostly lazy) to bring them to fruition. So if there are any film makers out there who would like to contact me or just want to steal the ideas, please be my guest.
Concept 1 “The Artist Dismantled”: This concept doesn’t even need to be filmed, this could actually just take place in a gallery. But believe me, I wouldn’t do this at any local art center. This event would have to happen at like the Whitney or something like that. The concept is simple and would be beautiful. All I need is a fairly large fish tank, about the size of a nice bath tub. The tank would have a beautiful base and be positioned in the middle of a gallery so that the art appreciating public can walk around the art piece.
Reminiscent of David Blaine I will be submerged up to the neck as if relaxing in a bath. As the opening of the exhibition transpires, an assistant in a tux will bring in a small fish bowl with a piranha and dump it into the tank. Every 20 minutes or so the assistant will return with another and pour it into my tank.
It won’t be like the movies where someone is attacked by thousands of piranha and turn into a skeleton in a minute, this will take the length of the exhibition which could be three to four weeks depending on the gallery.*
* Now obviously if this was real, this would be my final exhibition, which believe me, if it were at the Whitney, I’d be fine with that. If it is a ‘movie’ and I was directing, I’d prefer the art patrons to be aloof and just interested in the wine and snacks.
Concept 2 “My Retrospective”: This project is pretty much self explanatory if you just check-out the sketch below.
Alan Brown Art 
Alan, you are grim and funny, just like your paintings!