I just read an anecdote online today about a couple who got a new cat. In this scenario, I am the wife: The wife wanted a cat so badly and she finally convinced her husband to adopt. After all of that, to the wife’s dismay, the cat ended up bonding with the husband and was reticent towards her.
What we learned here is that cats see an overly affectionate human as being aggressive.
If you find your new cat is a bit reticent with you, still spend a lot if time with them, but go about your day as if the cat isn’t there. When you hear them meow or coo, throw out a few snacks with a few near your feet. Let them come to you and only reach out to pet when invited. Avoid direct eye contact or lower your eyes. And be sure to switch off with your partner feeding and litter cleaning duties.
A kitten will especially bond with one person in a household anyway, so be patient, all kittens grow up.
Good luck, and I love you for taking care of these wonderful creatures!
Alan Brown Art 